Consistency is something I have trouble with...

...though I do have a talent for the blatently obvious.

Two months! Well, not quite, but near enough. Two months since I lasted posted, and what a two months it's been.

In all fairness, I've been pretty busy getting back into a regular writing routine. I'm novelizing, which means I set myself a daily writing target of 1000 words (although I've got a broader target of 10 000 words a week, so there. I'm a writer. I'm not a mathematician). It takes me about an hour to actually get the 1000 words minimum down on the paper, but that hour requires a good hour of preparation and a fair amount of bimbling about during the writing. So one hour of writing takes about three hours. Which, if you get home at six and eat supper and then have to watch an hour of Gilmore Girls before bedtime (as well as check emails, wander through DWF etcetera) means that you don't have much time to do anything else. 

Wow. What a life I lead.

Anyway, over the last few weeks I've made the decision to leave my current job. At first I was going to apply for another full time position: got a few interviews, didn't take them. I couldn't really understand why I was so resistant, but I kept sending off for more application forms.

Then, a few weeks ago, I realised what it was. There I was, sitting at my desk, looking at the pile of forms and job descriptions, and I felt like crying. Did cry, a little, in fact. 

I just didn't want it. I didn't want the daily routine, didn't want the pressures and power plays and personal agendas that a permanent position would present. I didn't - don't want - anything to do with the political world that enwraps education nowadays. 

Basically, I just don't want to be a teacher anymore.

But I'm a sensible girl and I have to find money for the rent, so I've decided to work as a supply teacher from September. The idea is, I'll do some tutoring as well - to bulk up the monthly wage - and from talking to a few people, I've found that it won't mean too drastic a drop in salary. I made the decision a few weeks ago - and felt great about it - and now I'm less bouncy since fear is replacing pure excitement. Nonetheless, it's the right thing to do. Behind it all is my motivation to make writing the absolute centre of my life. To declare to all and sundry that this is what I want -- no, not what I want, but what I do. 

This being the case, I've also determined to enjoy the last half term at my current position. To end the year on a high, to end the year with the memory of what teaching can achieve if only the politicians and the advisors and other idiots would let the classroom practitioner get on with their job. To remember that the best teaching is all about the relationship that exists between the teacher and their students, and to remember that a good lesson inspires as well as teaches. At the height of my six year career, I've known this and I've lived this. I'd like it to be how I end this part of my career.